sad days

This week my neice's partner lost his Dad.  Suddenly and without warning. 

How quickly life can change in just an instant.  A family devasted, grieving and in shock.

Today when I  spoke to her I told her how proud I was of her.  I'm always proud but these last few days especially so. 

She has been brave and strong for not only her partner, but his Mum and brother.

My heart is breaking for their loss. 

Love them both so much.  xxoo

surprised myself

Over the weekend I was madly getting my media kit ready for my blog, as I'd had a couple of companies approach me and needed my blog's info and stats.  I was very chuffed!

For my readers who aren't bloggers a media kit is a like a resume for your blog.  It's what you present to companies that want to work with you and what you present to businesses who you would like to work with.

An important part of the media kit is detailing what you write and talk about on your blog.  This is where I came unstuck, with just one word.

Depression.

I thought if I put that one word down would companies want to work with me and my blog.  Would it make them think differently about me and my work.

I'm very open about my depression and previous PND so it surprised me that I hesitated to type the word.  With that moment of hesitation I'd let self doubt and shame the opportunity to rear its ugly head.  Something that I've work really hard to let go of.

This was not going to get the better of me. 

I typed that word with a smile on my face.  I'm proud of who I am, proud of how far I've come and proud that I keep it real on my blog.

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That speaks volumes.

tea and a cold

It's been a little quite here, I've got a cold.  Boo hoo I know!

Being a bad asthmatic I try my very best to rest to prevent it from going to my chest, because then it takes FOREVER to get better.  This leads to double doses of high strength antibiotics and usually ending up on Prednisone.  Something my GP and I try to avoid unless absolutely necessary.

Most people when they've got a cold eat soup, I make it for my son when he's sick, he loves it.  But I really hate soup, a lot.  It's just like hot salty water, but hey that's me, you can't like everything!

But tea is to me what soup is to others for a cold. 

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I drink copious amounts, can't get enough of the stuff.  Must be hot hot hot, english breakfast tea, one teaspoon of honey and a dash of soy milk.

Soothes my tired weary soul.

What about you, are a you a tea lover?

my path

The one thing I'm proud of myself for is learning to live in the PRESENT.  Instead of wallowing in the past, or worrying about the future.



if this is your picture, please let me know so I can give due credit

But I've had to work hard on it.  It's not something that has come easy.

However I keep getting the feeling I haven't conqured all my demons, and sometimes I feel stuck.  I want to learn to put these behind me and live the life that I'm meant to be living. 

Previously I've written about seeing a psychic and thinking that I might be ready to go and see one again.  Last week was emotional for me, not sure why, just one of those weeks I guess.  One of my good friends had seen a spiritual healer/psychic with similar feelings and emtions to what I'm experiencing.  She went and loved the experience.

I guess too after the turmoil that has been my life for the past 5 years, I'm interested to know what may lay ahead as I'm on an entirely new road that I was wasn't expecting to be on.

You may be thinking that this is a contradiction to my living in the present, it's not to me.  It's learning to let go of things I couldn't and can't change, accept my past and grab hold of today.

Tomorrow is my appointment.  I'm excited and really looking forward to it.

I'll let you know how it goes!

wordless wednesday - for trish

Today the blogging world is coming together in support of a very special blogger, Trish from My Little Drummer Boys.

Trish has, this week, been diagnosed with breast cancer.

Our love and prayers are with you. xxoo

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Linking up with My Little Boys for Wordless Wednesday. 
(I know it's NOT wordless folks!)

today is the day

Yesterday I joined Weight Watchers.

Exciting and terrifying both at the same time.

Exciting in that I am taking control of my life, in regards to my weight.  Nearly everything is where it should be in my life, after what has been a very bumpy few years. 

I am putting ME first.  Finally.

The fear of failing yet again terrifies me.  But something inside is telling me that it's going to be ok.

I've joined WW online, I'm 'ubermum' if you happen to be an online member.  Come and find me so I'm not all alone!

I shall endeavour to keep you up to date on my progress.  However I'm so NOT READY to share with the world my actual weight.  One day, maybe!

With that I'm off to indulge in huge bowl of ice cream and chocolate.......ONLY KIDDING I'm not going to sabotage myself before I even begin.

It's all part of my life to do list.

Let's get this show on the road, and don't forget to let me know if you are a WW member, I'd LOVE he support!

teenage love & tears

It's been a few years since I was teenager.

Ok maybe more than a few years, I have 14 year old son!

But I clearly remember my first love.  Remember vividly my heart being ripped out and smashed into a thousand pieces.

Crying, no sobbing, in the car with my Dad when he picked me up from work and telling him my boyfriend had cheated on me.

With a teacher.  From our school.

Yes you read that right.

And my Dad knew already, had just found out from one of his friend's.  Remember it's a small world people.

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Wow where do I start on this one?

Firstly as a Mum to a teenage boy in high school I would be mortified if a teacher pursued my son for a relationship.  I'd be on the school's doorstop in lightning speed, along with reporting it to the authorities.

Teachers are in a position of trust.  There is NO excuse for forming an inappropriate relationship with a student.  Suffice to say that I don't that the school were aware of the relationship, that, or they swept it under the carpet.  Not sure which one is correct.

I'll just call him Mr X for the sake of the story and anonymity.

We were in our final year of school, Year 12, and he was in my circle of friends.

At the end of Year 11 I knew I was starting to have feelings for him.  You know, a million butterflies in your tummy type of feeling?

Over those Christmas holidays our group spent a lot of time together and I knew he felt the same way about me.

Our relationship started very slowly, so sweet really, lots of hand holding and a kiss here and there.

My friends and I all turned 18 in our last year of school, so we had also started to go out to nightclubs.  I had an exciting curfew of midnight to be home!  I remember saying to Dad that that's when the action starts, his response..."that's entirely why I want you home at midnight!".

As a Mum, I now understand.

He was, rather is, a fabulous singer.  We had a mutual love of music.  And so did the teacher, a love of  music, and of him.

I'd had my suspicions as the year went on, but who really thinks their boyfriend is having a relationship with one of his teachers?  She wasn't one of my teachers, but when she walked past me she couldn't look me in the eye.

Then it started.  He stopped spending time with me.  Had a million excuses.  Stopped going out with us a group.  All the while my girlfriends picked me up and wiped away the tears.

Their relationship didn't become public until after we finished school.  Funny that. 

Years had passed and I found out that he'd had a long term relationship with the teacher.  Good on them I suppose, you can't deny someone love. 

Anyway so last year I was searching school friends on Face Book and I found him.  Thought OK I'll send him a friend request, love to see if he's still singing.  Be pretty cool to go hear him sing again. 

Don't worry Hubby was all OK with this! 

Didn't hear back so left it at that.

In the mean time, again a small world people, at a party I got chatting to his sister-in-law.  We ended up talking about Mr X, I asked how he was going, all was good and he was happy.  And she asked was I "that girl" he'd left for the teacher.  Yep that was me.  I'd mentioned to her that my best friend's Mum wanted to report them to the school, and I said no just leave it be.  Perhaps that wasn't the wisest decision to say that, but years had past.  I didn't think it was a sensitive topic any more.

I was wrong.

He accepted my friend request not long after that.  Accepted with a scathing comment on his page, directed to me.

Hubby was cooking dinner that night, and I saw the friend acceptance on my iPhone.  Read his message and was floored.  Headed immediately into the office, I needed to respond to Mr X immediately, my blood was boiling.

Talk about Chinese whispers.  His sister-in-law had relayed our conversations back to him, but instead of saying that my friend's Mother wanted to report them it was said that MY DAD AND I wanted to report them.  He also said that it was pretty sad that I wanted to do that, and possibly that I was shallow to do it.  Really?!  He can talk he had an affair with a TEACHER!

He finished with he was sure I wasn't happy and that I didn't have a wonderful life.  Nice.

I replied with "am very happy, have a wonderful life with an amazing family, thanks for asking."

Then promptly de-friended him.

Went back to the kitchen, explained it all to Hubby, and what did he do?  Burst out laughing!  Laughing at the whole situation, he thought it hilarious that something like that would anger me.

That's why I love him.  He's the only one who can keep me centred, make me realise that the whole world isn't about to fall apart, and most importantly makes me feel safe and loved.

I never would have had that with Mr X. 

His loss, my gain.

my boy's 14th birthday cake + basic cake recipe

Although my son's 14th birthday was last month, he didn't have his party with his mates until the weekend.

I woke up Saturday morning and knew the exact cake I wanted to make for him.  I'd seen this icing method on Pinterest and thought I must give it a go!  It needs perfecting but overall I was really happy with it.

Want to find me on Pinterest, then head on over here.  If you you need an invite then just shoot me an email and I'll send you one.

This is the method that grabbed my attention and the blog is just gorgeous, Sokkerrus. 

I found it really easy to do.  After I dragged the spoon on each icing dollop I dipped the spoon in hot water and dried on a clean tea towel, doing this will make each 'swipe' cleaner.

I'm also on a roll of testing out new cake recipes.  Not really ideal when I'm about to start Weight Watchers!

Anyhoo....

Saturday morning had me googling easy cake recipes and ones that didn't require room temperature butter as I didn't have time to wait for it to come to temperature.  Said son's football game was looming!

So I found this super easy basic cake mix at The Recipe Corner.  It's a denser cake, not as light as I would have liked, but good none the less.

Ingredients

175g soft margarine  (I used Nuttlex)
175g caster sugar
3 eggs
175g self-raising flour
1 tsp baking powder (I only had enough for one cake, and both turned out exactly the same)

Method

Preheat the oven to 170°C . (Each oven is different, I put mine at 180)

Place all the ingredients in a bowl and beat with an electric beater for 1-2 minutes or wooden spoon until evenly mixed.

Spoon into a greased and lined 18cm / 7inch round cake tin and bake for about 55 minutes until just firm.

Leave for a few minutes to cool a little before turning out on to a cooling rack.


So there you have it, a really quick cake to make.  And the boys loved it!

Do you have a fav cake recipe you always use?

Linking up with Domesblissity  for Thriving on Thursdays.

a scone kind of day

It was the Monday of the long weekend just gone.

We'd had a full and busy two days, both with late nights.  Monday was cold, windy and raining, just perfect for a day in the good old jimmy jams!

I woke up and thought it's a scone kinda day.

Quick, easy and oh so yummy.

ingredients

2 1/2 cups self-raising flour
1 tablespoon caster sugar
80g butter, chilled, chopped
1 cup milk
 jam and cream, to serve


method

Preheat oven to 220°C/200°C fan-forced. Lightly grease a baking tray.  I use a lamington tin.

Combine flour and sugar in a bowl. Using fingertips, rub butter into flour mixture until mixture resembles fine breadcrumbs.

Make a well in the centre of flour mixture. Add milk. Stir with a flat-bladed knife until mixture just comes together (don't over-mix). Place dough on a lightly floured surface. Knead gently to bring dough together.

Gently press dough into a 2cm-thick round. Dip your cutter into flour. Cut out scones. Place scones, touching, in prepared pan. Sprinkle with a little extra flour. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes or until golden. Remove from oven. Cool in pan for 5 minutes. Wrap in a clean tea towel to keep warm.

Serve with jam and cream.

Linking up with Domesblissity for Thriving Thursday!

don't call me, maybe

It's a relief to see that I'm not alone in that I really hate talking on the telephone!

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I was starting to feel like a had a phone phobia until I discovered that more and more people feel like I do. Phew!

BUT.....I'm never without my iPhone, unless it's flat, which I've been known to let happen (bought a car charger now to alleviate that problem).

I don't know exactly when I started to really dislike the telephone, just a gradual progression.

Don't worry I do talk (a lot) in person, face to face, once I get to know you.  Because I'm shy (contradiction to blogging really isn't it!).

**LIGHT BULB MOMENT**

Shy......maybe that's why I don't like talking on the phone?!

So before you pick up the phone to call me, may I suggest texting (if you have my number!), email, twitter, facebook or instagram (search ubersimplicity), and I guarantee it will be far EASIER to contact me!

OK so who is like me and has an iPhone and uses it for everything other than calling people?!

things on my life to-do list

What exactly does the universe hold for me?

I'm not entirely sure.

Sometimes I feel that I'm on the right path and everything is clear in front of me, but at other times I wonder why the universe pulled me is such different directions to what I had planned.

Directions that are, and were, hard and challenging.  Relationships with others, all hurting me to my very being.  Some of these I've been able to accept and move forward, some still hang there like a big black cloud, not resolved.

One thing that I have learnt is that I am the ONLY one accountable for my happiness, and that I'm not responsible for how others think or feel toward me or my decisions.

With that in mind I need to re-evaluate my dreams and goals for the future.

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In no particular order here are my top 10 goals, short and long term, personal and business:

one
a break away with my man, to a winery, just me and him (this is my number one goal)

two
a family holiday, just the three of us, nothing would make me happier

three
write my media kit for my blog

four
write at least five posts per week

five
attend a blogging conference

six
start winning my weight battle

seven
to continue to be happy and fight my ongoing battle with depression

eight
for my writing to take me on an incredible journey

nine
do a photography course so I know how to use my DSLR camera PROPERLY

ten
attend a weekend cooking class at the Thai cooking school on the Sunshine Coast

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I've learnt that that writing down your goals and dreams makes you more accountable and the goals more achievable.

How about you, do you have a list?

a special night out

Last Saturday was a very special night, full of laughter, love and tears.

Exactly how I wanted it to be.

It was the night of the fundraiser I put together for a very special family, you can read more about them here and here.

Introducing you to Marisa and Jim, the night was for them.

Very simple but elegant flower centre pieces for the tables.  I went to the local flower market in the morning, such an inexpensive way to buy flowers, and loosely arranged them in vases.

I enlisted the help of my son and niece to greet the Guests when the arrived and to be the raffle ticket sellers, they did and excellent job!

The raffle prizes on the night!  We were very blessed to have such fabulous people and businesses support our cause.  I'd like to take a moment and tell you who they were.

Tony's Pizzeria {dinner voucher}

Paisley Road {gift basket}

Burleigh Showcase Jewellers {ladies DKNY watch}

Event Cinemas Robina {double movie pass}

Ella Bache Robina {facial voucher}

Rebecca Lock - Tupperware {gift pack}

Earthborn Homewares - Harbourtown {gift packs x 2}

Crown and Glory {cut colour voucher}

Glades Golf Club { 4 x rounds golf}

Royal Pines Resort {4 x rounds golf}

Robina Woods {4 x rounds golf}

Lakelands Golf Club {4 rounds of golf}

Parkwood Golf Club {4 rounds golf + putt putt for the family}

Hickey Lawyers {signed + framed signed 2012 Titans jersey}

Sea FM {corporate box for next Titans home game}

Thank you to Kim, Karlene and Laura also for donating items to the raffle.

A huge thank you to Timberplay who have donated a cubby house to Elisa,  it will be installed and ready for when she comes home from hospital, including window flower boxes.

Cupcakes I made for the Guests.  You know how I love my baking!

The speeches were warm and heartfelt, tissues were required!

A huge thank you goes to Bethanie from Pink Images who donated her time to capture the night in photos.  All the images in this post (apart from the cubby house) were taken on the night by Bethanie. 

Heart felt thanks to family, friends and businesses that not only attended the night but donated to the My Cause Fundraising Page.  This will enable their next journey to be somewhat easier, albeit financially, and efforts to be focused on 3 year old Elisa as she recovers from open heart surgery.

Thank you, there are no words for your generosity. xxoo

 

Linking up with Twinkle in the Eye for Flash Blog Friday!

planets out of alignment, perhaps

Wow what happened last week?

Perhaps the planets and stars were out of alignment?  Or maybe Venus passing in front of the sun caused unrest within the human population temporarily disabling the function of manners and respect for others.

Last week I witnessed both in real life and the internet world explode with selfish action.

• the Chrissy Swan debacle
• charity pages for children being bombed with so called "do gooder" comments
• family negatively talking about other family members, so not cool
• bloggers getting jealous of prominent bloggers being picked up by a PR agency, jealously is a curse ladies, I aspire to be a blogger that may one day indeed be picked up by such an agency
• blog posts be taken down, FB pages being closed, all due to general nastiness
• the internet is FOREVER, and you are liable for what you write, keep that in mind
• remember that real people are behind blogs, FB pages and Tweets, these people have feelings

Perhaps we need to go back to the old school adage of  "if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything at all".

Do you believe in Karma?

sunday sessions/feeding the soul {courage}



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It sure does.

It's taken me until now (early 40's) to be really comfortable with who I am, what I stand for and what I believe in.

I've learnt to be vocal and to stand up for myself.

What matters to me is my family, the three of us.  Everything else is secondary to that.

My road hasn't been easy, like so many of you.  But I'm thankful for each bump in the road.  For without them I wouldn't be who I am, without them I wouldn't appreciate the simple things.

Have you found your courage?

friends are family you choose

Family.  Can't live with them, can't live without them.

Today I saw the ugly side of what family can do.  To each other.  Maybe purposely, maybe not.

And I was angry.  Oh so very angry. 

It's heart breaking, cruel and unnecessary. 

Perhaps jealousy is thrown in and makes people act the way they do.  I don't know I can't figure it out.

What you gossip about a loved one will eventually catch you up, and you'll end up looking shallow, small minded and cruel. 

Sometimes friends make the best family.

don't tell a mother

All right I'm going to dip my foot into the muddy waters of others telling a mother what they should or shouldn't be doing with their children.

I'm speaking out due the overwhelming abuse Chrissy Swan has endured over the fact that her 3 year old boy is 'pudgy'.

This is the apparent offending photo.

You can read more on the article here.

I read with interest that a Neighbours star tweeted the following:

"This (Swan's pro-fat attitude) makes me furious ...

You (Swan) are responsible for getting your preschooler to the point of needing to go on a (diet)."

This is coming from a 21 year old who has NEVER had a child and more than likely never had a weight issue in her life.  Interesting how she later deleted the Tweet and issued an apology.

Reading that brought back memories of someone telling me what I should be feeding my then 9 year old son.  Again from someone who is not a mother, again young, and again never had a weight issue.

Now my boy is by no means overweight but he does have puppy fat.  It is under control and he will loose it as he grows older.  He has a healthy respect for food, is very active with many friends and is a confident young man who knows he is loved.  What more can I, as a Mother, ask for? 

I can relate to Chrissy in that I too started attending Weight Watchers before I was 10.  Whether or not that has influenced my relationship with food I'm not sure, given that at the same time my parents divorced and from then I've had a constant battle with my weight.  I don't blame my Mum or Dad, it's just the way it is.

Do I wish I wasn't on this journey with my weight?  For sure.  Does it make me feel any less of a person than a person who is at their ideal weight?  Not a chance in hell.

I have an issue with people projecting their feelings onto a Mother who clearly loves her child.  How about we direct that energy to looking after children who are in abusive homes, unloved and with no food.

We are not perfect, Mothers make mistakes.  But it's our mistake to make, it's our mistake to learn from.  We do the very best that we can do for our children.  I'm not sure where this culture has come from of late to have a go at women just doing their job.  But it needs to stop.  It's not healthy.

Show me a perfect Mother and I'll share my millions of dollars that I've won five times this week in the British National Lottery.

I commend Chrissy for being so open and honest with her feelings on food and her weight, and that she has accepted the person that she is.  A beautiful funny, gorgeous woman.

Perhaps those that purport their feelings of disgust, judgement or hate need to look inward at themselves first.

Just sayin.

a special night

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Never be afraid to dream.  And dream big.

That's the lesson I took away from the fundraiser I put together for my girlfriend and her family over the weekend.

I had a dream of helping a gorgeous family in a time of need.  To make their lives a little easier during yet another obstacle that was placed in front of them.  You can read more about them here.

It came to fruition and more than exceeded my expectations.  The amount raised was more than double to what I set as my goal.

This was made possible by our amazing supportive family and friends.  For that I am eternally grateful. 

I don't have any pictures to share yet as we had an official photographer on the night, Bethanie from Pink Images.  Very excited to get my hands on them when they're ready.  And I didn't take ONE pic on my iPhone!

Of course there were tears on the night, the speeches were beautiful and heartfelt.  They even made my Dad cry!  But he's a softie at heart, he just tries to hide it.

There was dancing, talking, laughing, eating and drinking.  A perfect mix.  A perfect night.